A place where awareness comes to the forefront. A place where conscious minded sexuality and relationship educators, advocators, and creatives can unite and share their work with the World.. Where different voices come together as one to help us evolve as human beings.
Steffen Aaskoven: Producer/Songwriter of Bliss and Finland & Aaskoven
In The Deep, Dark, the Light, The Shadow, The Evolution of Love…Love is there, within each one of us, UNIVERSAL LOVE, when we no longer believe, or think we are worthy.
H. Samarel- Erotic artist painting the art of making love, depicting the sexual energy between couples
Samarel erotic art, http://www.samarelart.com
Consciousness, Fluidity, Unknown, Weaving from Passion into Slowness
Sleeping Together by Jonti-Eroslife
The most popular one is ‘they slept together’. As I understand it, there’s a difference, a big difference between having sex and sleeping.
Which made me think of something.
In the world of healing, growth and consciousness the phrase ‘waking up’ is used extensively.
And many of us are waking up in many aspects of life. We’re becoming more aware of energy, of health, of eating, of different ways of having relationships, different ways of being with money, more aware of the possibilities of life.
And yet sexually many of us are asleep. We are sleeping with someone, even though we’re having sex.
We’re having sex as an expression of a pattern, we do the same thing in the same way.
We’re having sex with the limited goal of orgasm. Not that there’s anything wrong with orgasms, it simply limits the possibilities of pleasure.
We’re having sex that is often not an expression of the authenticity of our pleasure being, of the fullness of who we are.
We’re having sex with myth, misinformation and misunderstanding.
We’re having sex with guilt and shame and embarrassment.
We’re having sex to please others, were having unfulfilled sex, we’re having painful sex, we’re feeling sexual pressure, we don’t know how to communicate about sex.
We’re sexually asleep.
The amount of sexual issues and problems isn’t decreasing, just the opposite.
As many women as ever are struggling to have orgasms. More men are being effected by erection and early ejaculation. Stress is impacting on more people’s libidos than ever before.
More people are using porn as a asexual substitute than ever before.
More people are suffering from a lack of intimacy, a loss of connection, less touch and love than ever before.
It’s time to wake up.
To become more conscious of our sexuality, of our sexual energy and its power.
And maybe the most powerful place to start is the heart.
When we connect sex and heart everything starts to change and become different.
Then we add intention. Why are we having sex, what are we doing with our sexual experiences, are we choosing them consciously, do they expand us, grow us, bring us closer to ourselves, to another person?
As we wake up and see more of the possibilities of pleasure, and how it impacts on every area of life we’ll learn more. We’ll see that our sexuality isn’t in a vacuum, it’s woven into the fabric of everything we do, it’s linked to our health, as out health is linked to our sexuality. We’ll see that it’s linked to our emotional well-being, as that’s linked to our sexuality. We’ll see that it’s linked to our creativity, as our creativity is linked to everything we do.
We’ll even see how it’s linked to the work we do and…and…and…
Well start to explore the limitless possibilities of Conscious Sexuality, Neo-Tantric and Taoist practices and ideas.
We’ll be more relaxed, much more relaxed. We’ll be less stressed. We’ll have more energy. We’ll be more connected to life, to possibilities.
We’ll become more conscious.
And as everything within is connected in this incredible mystery that is us, that is life, we’ll see how becoming more sexually awake will help other parts of us awaken even more.
Fair chance we’ll become more accepting of others and the way they live as we express the fullness of our sexuality, because we’re more accepting of ourselves.
Fair chance we’ll become more curious, which is one of the most important qualities of growth, and engage more with life, because we’ll explore our inner world, our bodies and the possibilities it holds more.
We’ll become more aware, we’ll explore what does it mean to be a man, a woman in the world today, how do we express those energies in our lives?
Power, where do we feel it, where do we lack it, how do we do anything we can to feel powerful, and how often is that at the expense, the abuse of another?
We’ll see how many of the limiting beliefs of our lives can change, as we look at the limitations and inhibitions we accepted as part of our programming and conditioning. If I can change my sexual beliefs, that are often passed down generationally, I can change my beliefs about myself, about money, about other people, about work, about love, about the life I can live.
There’s more, so much more.
As our eyes open a little wider, as our hearts open a little more, as we wake up to the beautiful, powerful energy of our sexuality and its myriad expressions, we’ll wake up more to life.
And being more awake we’ll be amazed at the world just beyond our thoughts, just beyond the experience of our bodies. And each experience, each thought, each exploration, each conversation will show us more of the amazing, transformational power of our sexuality.
Activism, Oppression + Somatics by Erin, The Invisible School/ErosEnaction
A huge reason I LOVE my work is because it offers unto the world pragmatic tools for dealing with systemic oppressions and enhancing on-going inter-connection.
No matter ones background, we are all exposed to societal norms. Each of us has a unique body-experience. Societal norms and structures relate to all of our bodies differently. In some way or another, most people experience being oppressed – or, being squished, suppressed, in body and/or in mind – by the way societal norms relate to their body-experience.
Somatic work helps illuminate our sensations, and thereby creates more possibility for change. It can help us heal and grow. The techniques are free. Practicing is always available. Our feeling of agency is expanded – which can result in concrete changes in the quality of our life.
As we learn to feel into the experience of our life, we learn to FEEL the literal inter-connection that we have with others. This increases our ability to deeply listen to another. The act of deeply listening – to the entire organism of the human next to you – is a tremendous ACT of CARE. It is one of the most basic and profound things we can offer each other. Everyday. Everywhere.
To reach the ability to listen to another we must PRACTICE. It is not something regularly taught in most societies. To begin to listen to oneself is only one part of the puzzle. If you are stopping at your own skin, keep listening. Listen into the air between us. We are connected to each other and to all of nature.
On Experts, Erin/ErosEnaction
6 August 2018.
If my appendix explodes I would like to be around someone trained in performing an appendectomy.
In more complex situations, experts in the same field can give varied recommendations. They may even give information that is contradictory to one another.
A friend recently injured their knee. Included in the advice they were given by various expert sources: Swim. Do not to swim. Do Tai Chi. Don’t do Tai Chi. Don’t move in ways which bring pain. Move into the pain.
How does one know what to do? Who do you trust?
There are no easy answers here. Below are a few, quite intense stories. I feel the intensity is necessary to speak to the complexity of our situations. For, it is when we are in intense situations that we most often seek ‘experts’ to support us.
This is a brief version of an extremely personal story. My sister was very sick. She was unable to be helped by several, highly touted therapists – psychiatrists, psychologists with certified somatic training, clinics specializing in depression and suicide, and clinics specializing in anorexia. My sister did not live through this experience. What I witnessed was a person in a situation too complex to be properly held by a variety of experts in their field. She needed more and different care than they were able to provide. Many of them sent her away, stating that they did not have the capacity to help her – some citing insurance policies. Her therapist openly stated that he had failed to give her his full attention. I walked next to her for a large part of this journey and felt – as I intimately knew her – that she did want to live. Yet, we could not find her enough, fitting support.
Another story, years later. I was in attendance in a somatic sexuality course. During one exercise in this course a participant was touched in a region specifically marked as ‘out of bounds.’ The violated participant had previously been sexually assaulted. This new violating touch resulted in a trauma response of freezing, unraveling into many difficult months of recovering from this experience. No participant in the course remembered bringing touch to this participant; and, the violating touch (not the person who brought the violating touch) was seen by the instructors. After this, effort was put forth by the instructors to process this situation. Still, the person who was violated did not feel the situation was adequately addressed and has since distanced themselves from this community. There was a general note given to the class to look into learning more about trauma response. That said, the person who brought this touch remained a mystery and the entire class carried on, en route to become certified somatic sexuality practitioners.
Pausing a moment to take in these stories. Then I bring you this question: which expert is not also a fallible human?
What are the qualities that you seek in an expert? What do they seem to be paying attention to when you meet with them? How did they come to learn this expert knowledge they are sharing? Does it feel like they are listening to you?
How do you feel while you are with them? After meeting with an expert do you create space to sense into your entire reaction (including cognition, emotions and the murky unknowns within you)?
Somatic work is about learning to feel. It’s learning to taste the nuances of sensations – thoughts, emotions, all aspects of our experience. Do some thoughts taste acidic? Do some people make you feel like honey? Do some activities make you feel vital?
Somatics is about feeling into all the information – the expert’s advice, your own cognitive knowledge, how the all-of-you feels when you consider a situation. Then you take a small step in some particular direction and notice again, how does this feel? Maybe you stay still for a long time if you don’t know. Maybe you try a step and then step back. Maybe you try a step and then shift towards the right.
It’s slow going. There are no easy answers here.